Summertime

It’s July and along with the wave of heat, mosquitos and personal fans filling Mutt HQ, we’ve been seeing a lot of books from some lovely hopeful interns. Today I had the opportunity to sit down with our first-round draft pick, Darcie Burrell, writer, poet and all around girl.

Z: Hey Darcie! Welcome to the den. Now, this isn’t our first encounter is it? We’ve got what you might call a bit of a history. I graduated from the Ad Program at UO last year, you graduated from that same program this past June. We had the same classes and we even produced a little gem together. How’d you like the program?

Darcie: I loved it. The ad program there was like one big, hilariously dysfunctional, incestuous family. And we had a cool mom.

Z: Already, I’m impressed with your ability to speak in hyper-links. Well done! That’s a cute little whatever it is in your arms….What is it?

Darcie: I don't know. I think she's the guardian of the Girls' Corner. She has no hands.

Z: So where’d you come from?

Darcie: Las Vegas.

Z: What's the coolest place in Vegas?

Darcie: Cesar E. Chavez park. It's actually a really poorly designed park behind a middle school I didn't go to, but it has a great view of the city. And swings.

Z: You’ve lived in Portland for about two weeks now, what’s your favorite space here?

Darcie: I haven't been here long enough to give you a real answer to that, but I love Peninsula Park. It sounds like all I do is go to parks. Maybe I'm just trying to prove I go outside sometimes.

Z: Point established. And may I add, how very Oregon of you. Now that you’re a Mutt I’d like to know what type of Mutt you imagine yourself as.

Darcie: A great dihuahua.

Z: Is it like a Liger/Tion where it matters which one is male and which is female?

Darcie: I have no idea.

Z: Oh…..

Darcie: ….

Z: What’s your favorite color?

Darcie: I'm glad you asked. I've recently retired green, so I'm excited to say purple. PURPLE!!!!!!!!!!

Z: What's something you've never told anyone?

Darcie: "David is right."

Z: Speaking of bitches…As you may have heard, Mona isn’t keen on having other canine visitors in the office, will that affect your pet situation at all?

Darcie: But Mona is so friendly! And no, we should be just fine. I have a fish and it lives in a bowl on a shelf in my bedroom. It doesn’t get out much.

Z: What’s your fish’s name?

Darcie: David...

Z: …Darcie?

Darcie: It’s name is David. And I tell every David I meet that I named my fish after him. By the way – I named my fish after you.

Z: That’s a first. How do you feel about Millennials?

Darcie: I feel like we like parks.

Now we’ve come to the guest speed questionnaire portion of the interview--

Raphie: What is the average velocity of a sparrow?

Darcie: About as fast as I drive on the freeway – 25 mph.

Beauvais: what is your fondest memory growing up?

Darcie: Hosting a Barbie-Q in third grade. All my friends came and we melted our dolls on my dad's grill. Then we swam.

Scott: which animal would you most want to spend time with AND eat?

Darcie: Is this a personal attack because I eat fish now? Because the answer is people, Scott. It's people.

Nick: why does she think the weather gods hate portland so much?

Darcie: Most strip clubs and micro breweries per capita? You tell me.

And finally! Pop Quiz: What are the partners names and what is each of their favorite color and food?

Darcie:

Scott Cromer - Red, gelato

Steve Luker - Blue, holiday candy bars
Mike McCommon - Green, acai berries

Z: Aced. Thanks Darcie. Glad to have you!