After ten days of sobriety and a steady diet of yoga and egg salad, I feel amazing. Just this morning I was able to bounce up a flight of stairs without blacking out and/or seeing stars. I also feel less hostile, and oddly calm. That being said, I’m bored out of my mind. If I continue on this course, my soul is going to evaporate (and reincarnate as a whiskey tumbler). A life without sin, I’m learning, is probably not worth living. No, that's not a suicide threat. It’s simply an urgent request for a slice of pizza and a Camel Light. Thank you.